The lights outside the hospital emergency room were like the lights on the landing strip of an airport and I was a helicopter hovering, hovering, hovering. I stood on the street outside the emergency room of the Atlantic City Hospital. I had been in a blackout and I did not know how I got there. Finally, a paramedic came over to me, after 5 or 20 minutes. An hour? I don’t know.
"Do you need help?"
I answered, "This is not working. This is not working. The alcohol is not working. I cannot do what this is now, not working...."
I collapsed on the street like a sandcastle knocked over by a wave. My sand spread out onto the sidewalk....
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