14 April 2018

The Only World I Knew Was Alcohol

Frankly, I'm almost speechless when I read those 7 little words, "The only world I knew was alcohol."  The utter emptiness of that world spilled out, leaving me with nothing. Alcohol, my everything. The animal I became. Sadly best expressed below, seeking, at that time, neither sympathy nor empathy, somehow, I came to in a sober world of which I knew nothing, a clueless, hopeless alien.
"When I drink, the only world there is, is alcohol. I will drink until I blackout and I will continue drinking until I pass out. More is the only word I know. More, until I blackout and then still more until my body shuts down and I pass out. And somehow, even then, more is not enough. My disease cannot ever be satisfied. When there is nothing else, there is always more.
More is everything... and nothing.
I will never be like most normal folks.
When I drink, the only world there is, is alcohol."

No wonder that I learned to say "Nothing matters more than that we remain sober because when we remain sober everything matters more."
#Alcoholism #Addiction #Recovery
The passages in quotes are excerpted from ALL DRINKING ASIDE: The Destruction, Deconstruction and Reconstruction of an Alcoholic Animal http://amzn.to/1bX6JyO
Recovery Tweets: http://twitter.com/JimAnders4
140+ Recovery Posts: https://goo.gl/fmzt9b

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