17 December 2017

Drinking Career... OVER. Game Raised to Recovery Level. Deal With It.


I cannot betray today, the sober days leading up to now, this certain resiliency which I have somehow obtained, this gift. One drink would toss that all away. I'm invested in my sobriety now as I once was too invested in drinking as a means of self-definition. Moving forward in my sobriety actually feels good today, natural. My ever more painful relapses have brought me through these rings of fire to my current calm and sober place, a recovery enhanced by the routine miracle of breath.
Simon says, "Stay sober."
"Simon Says," the schoolyard game, "Drinking game... Over."
Too many crises. Too much disaster. Drinking career... over. Game raised to recovery level. Deal with it.

*****
"Nothing matters more than that we remain sober because when we remain sober everything matters more."
*****
#Alcoholism #Addiction #Recovery
*****
Take a ride on ALL DRINKING ASIDE, An Autobiographical Fiction: http://amzn.to/1bX6JyO
Recovery Tweets: http://twitter.com/JimAnders4
140+ Recovery Posts: https://goo.gl/fmzt9b

01 December 2017

Sugar-Coated Excuses in a Toolbox of Denial and Lies


If there are things you wish to never forget, you might do well to meditate on them. Blackout drinking is near the top of that list for me. Many social drinkers out there don't understand exactly what blackout drinking is. Conscious in the moment, the drinker continues to drink up a storm. To the observer, it appears impossible that he or she will not later remember the events taking place. After all, the person is still awake and drinking. How could they not remember? The blackout drinker does not remember because no memories are being formed. Essentially, there is no memory to remember....
***** 
Denial was my Tootsie Pop, the butterscotch of my addiction within this hardball sugar coating. Orange and gold, somehow forgivable. Gumdrops, lollipops... Some wrapped too tight, many unraveling. Blackouts from drinking rolled in coconut. Or cocaine. How did I survive this? How will I survive this? I cannot, should not, must not do this alone.
*****
Yes. It was like that. Very much like that. Exactly like that. Let me not fail to mention bragging rights. Going out the very next night, repeatedly bragging that we did not remember what happened to all our money, where our conversations had failed, how we got home. Each trying to outdo the next, each claiming to be more drunk than the next, a sort of party game we only partially knew we were playing.
At least this. At least that. There are always a million ways to diminish how dangerous blackout drinking is. My big at least (among others) was "at least I no longer drive a car," as if that somehow made it all alright. Diminish, exaggerate. What really did happen? Try a big, fat nothing. Addiction fed, addiction fed. Pass out in bed, almost dead. 
*****
Realistically, blackout drinking is very, very dangerous, but it became the new normal for me. I got home safely, didn't I? Oh, well, I'd say to myself in one of my many states of denial.
The irony here is that I must remember now that I could not remember then. This is not lost on me. Clarity, another tool in my toolbox replacing the butterscotch of my addiction....
*****
Move over, Rover. Recovery finally took over.
Those were the days that weren't. Empty candy wrappers and the illusion of candy. 
Recovery is the real real deal. 
Use every tool in your recovery toolbox. Illusions shattered will take some tinkering. Not to mention... tons and tons of your unthinker-ing, LoL!
*****
"Nothing matters more than that we remain sober because when we remain sober everything matters more."
*****
#Alcoholism #Addiction #Recovery
*****
You may also enjoy, then share, ALL DRINKING ASIDE: The Destruction, Deconstruction & Reconstruction of an Alcoholic Animal http://amzn.to/1bX6JyO
Recovery Tweets: http://twitter.com/JimAnders4
160+ Recovery Posts: https://goo.gl/fmzt9b

21 November 2017

My 8 Favorite Recovery Posts of 2017


As each year draws to a close, I like to take a moment to look back and reflect on my progress and my insanity (some things never change). Here are My Favorite 8 Recovery Posts of 2017. I've included a link at the end in case you'd like to let me know if you have a favorite I haven't included here. Writing helps me stay sober. Hopefully reading what I have written has entertained and/or informed. Thanks!

(In alphabetical order by Title):

1. "Alcohol Replaced Me, Cell by Cell... "​https://goo.gl/RFbRyz
2. "Almost a Prayer": https://goo.gl/5F1fVs
3. "Amputee's Phantom Pain / Addiction's Phantom Pleasure": https://goo.gl/Rw5C5C
4. "Dr. Jim (that's me) Now Prescribes Endless Refills of ... ": https://goo.gl/DC9EHX
5. "High-Functioning Alcoholic?"https://goo.gl/7Cu2qG
6. "The Insanity of Alcoholism... Relapse": https://goo.gl/CXBD8u
7. "PTSD: Do Not Forget a Soldier's Heart": https://goo.gl/2Me63A
8. "The Tomb of the Anonymous Addict":https://goo.gl/kL2PK5

Some readers may remember other posts that they favor more than these 8. Find another 150+ Recovery Posts here: https://goo.gl/fmzt9b.
And if Tweets are more your cup of tea, find 100's here: https://twitter.com/JimAnders4
HAPPY HOLIDAYS, THANKSGIVING right up through GROUNDHOG DAY to Each and All!
It's a little early, I know, but Happy 2018 (I never thought I'd live to see 2000). My Gratitude Abounds!
One final note: Please feel free to share this post for friends, family and co-workers that might appreciate it. Thanks, again!



10 November 2017

05 February 2017

"The Flow of Alcohol is Beaten by..."


The Flow of Alcohol is Beaten by
The Flow of Life.
(The River of Time is Slow & Deep)


*****
#Alcoholism #Addiction #Recovery
*****

Find a basketful of Recovery Tweets here: 


Explore the flavor and texture of other Recovery Posts on LinkedIn here: 

A Dog-Eared Review of All Drinking Aside!


 on April 24, 2015

Format: Paperback Verified Purchase


So I probably wouldn't need my high-lighter, right? WRONG!!! The book was so good that I found myself starting to bend the corners of certain pages and finally broke down and started high-lighting many passages. Much of the book is now high-lighted in yellow.

Jim Anders tells the journey inside the mind of an alcoholic/addict from the beginnings through recovery. Whether or not you are an addict/alcoholic, we all know someone who is (often in our family). This book clears away the mystery of much that is going on.

I highly recommend it and am already thinking of people to whom I might gift it.


*****
#Alcoholism #Addiction #Recovery
*****
All Drinking Aside: The Destruction, Deconstruction & 
Reconstruction of an Alcoholic Animal is linked here: 
https://goo.gl/ycu5jg 

Find a basketful of Recovery Tweets here: 


Explore the flavor and texture of other Recovery Posts on LinkedIn here: 



03 February 2017

"Alcohol Replaced Me, Cell by Cell... "


Alcohol replaced me, cell by cell.
Until none of me was left.
Or so it seemed.
My life,
A dream within a dream within a dream.
Merrily,
Then not so merrily,
Now merrily again.

Row, Row, Row your boat
Until you can no longer float.

That's how it went.
That's how it was.
But I have lived to tell the tale.

Adjust your sail.

Without fail, 
Recovery will replace your fall from grace,
Cell by cell, alcohol will be replaced.
Your place at the table is set.

Welcome back to the Human Race.


*****
#Alcoholism #Addiction #Recovery
*****
If you like this post, you may also like
"Flying Rivers of Hope," linked here:
https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/flying-rivers-hope-jim-anders?trk=mp-reader-card
&
"Tomorrow is the Apple Seed of Now," linked here:
https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/tomorrow-apple-seed-now-jim-anders?trk=mp-reader-card
*****
Please feel free to share this and any of my posts.
*****
This verse is not from All Drinking Aside, but I hope that it will serve 
as a bridge, a window and a door to what you will find there....
*****
All Drinking Aside: The Destruction, Deconstruction & 
Reconstruction of an Alcoholic Animal is linked here: 
https://goo.gl/ycu5jg 

Find a basketful of Recovery Tweets here: 


Explore the flavor and texture of other Recovery Posts on LinkedIn here: 


02 February 2017

What Matters More?


"Nothing matters more than that we remain sober because when we remain sober everything matters more."
*****
#Alcoholism #Addiction #Recovery
*****

from All Drinking AsideThe Destruction, Deconstruction 
& Reconstruction of an Alcoholic Animal, linked here: 
https://goo.gl/ycu5jg 

Find a basketful of Recovery Tweets here: 


Explore the flavor and texture of more than 
70 Recovery Posts on LinkedIn here: 

Tomorrow is the Apple Seed of Now


... Tomorrow is a storm coming over South Mountain.
The lightning's light will quickly reach us.
The thunder's rumble: an old man shuffling our way.
I thirst for rain, the hope for change.
I hold hope and turn it in my hand
like a hand holding and turning an apple.
Tomorrow is the apple seed of now....
*****
#Alcoholism #Addiction #Recovery
*****
from All Drinking AsideThe Destruction, Deconstruction 
& Reconstruction of an Alcoholic Animal, linked here: 
https://goo.gl/ycu5jg 

Find a basketful of Recovery Tweets here: 


Explore the flavor and texture of more than 
60 Recovery Posts on LinkedIn here: 



31 January 2017


I drank long enough and hard enough that eventually there was no bar big enough to hold my emptiness.

All ??? Aside