In the far-flung future, when I will have written and rewritten this post several times, it will have become more refined, sculptured, recognizable. Memory of its original contents will have been altered in each subsequent remembering.
That's part of my point.
Let me proceed in rough-hewn form.
The Dilophosaurus pictured here is a fairly complete fossil.
Not so the remains of the bones of memories from my drunken days.
Like the children's puzzle book, "Where's Waldo?," I would have to do much searching to reconstruct my 30 years of drinking into a recognizable form.
The skeletal remains of my drunken days were incomplete.
I was broken.
Addiction breaks everyone.
Those who remain have much reconstruction to do to put together a clean, sober and survivable sense of self, a life worth living.
Go back to the title of this post, "The Destruction, Deconstruction and Reconstruction of an Alcoholic Animal."
What do destruction, deconstruction and reconstruction have in common? Like any fan of "Where's Waldo?" might advise you, "Keep Looking!"
It's simple. The word "STRUCTURE" is buried deep (or not so deeply) within each of these words.
Alcohol destroyed my life (structure destroyed).
What little was left would have to be held up to the light of day, examined for clues as to how it could have gone so well for so long until "by the time I had a reason to stop drinking, reason no longer had anything to do with it."
I would have to deconstruct my past addiction to construct a life fully in recovery.
Point to make: I did not even see the word "STRUCTURE" as the unifying element underlying my book's subtitle when it was first published. Such an awareness took time.
Recovery, for me, has been, ultimately, about structure.
All Drinking Aside: The Destruction, Deconstruction and Reconstruction of an Alcoholic Animal.
It's beginning to make sense to me now.
I hope it serves you well as a tool in your Recovery Toolbox.
ALL DRINKING ASIDE: The Destruction, Deconstruction & Reconstruction of an Alcoholic Animal
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