21 January 2017

AFTER RELAPSE: What seems impossible becomes possible.

After my first relapse, early recovery was like the repeat of a TV show I really didn't like the first time. 
Why bother? 
I may as well drink.... 
I didn't fit in.
My old self seemed unable to assimilate into this radically different altered state I kept hearing called normal. Dramatically contrary to my customary under-the-weather life, the climate called sobriety did not feel like the greatest thing since sliced bread for an eternity. Mentally, I ran the gamut from an occasional sense of acute awareness to seemingly endless and excruciatingly numbing lows. My brain mimicked the extreme effects of alcohol, even in its absence, until the momentum of 30 years of addiction slowly subsided. As I've heard it expressed in recovery meetings, "when I finally got the monkey off my back, the circus was still in town."
For me, for some, for many, for most, relapses are like the building blocks that eventually strengthen one's foundation in recovery. Truly, I had to learn to crawl before I could walk. The sober life becomes livable, doable... strong!
Many die trying to find their way in what to them is an extraordinary, uncharted landscape. That's true.
But don't give up if you falter and fall. Stand up. Dust yourself off. Get help. Move forward. For me, for some, for many, for most, recovery becomes the only imaginable way to truly live.
The seemingly impossible becomes possible. As Dr. Ron B. says, "You alone can do it, but you can't do it alone."
Strive on! 
Strive... STRONG!

#Alcoholism #Addiction #Recovery
"Nothing matters more than that we remain sober because when we remain sober everything matters more."
This post is written by Jim Anders, author of All Drinking Aside: 
The Destruction, Deconstruction & Reconstruction of an Alcoholic Animal:

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